Blessings in disguise...

So there have been a lot of changes going on in my life the last couple months... First my wedding got called off (not once, but twice), I moved twice, have been looking for a job and a car and a few other things... I was really depressed and lonely all the time. All I really wanted was for things to be the way they were a year ago, I wanted to be married to the man I loved more than anything... I wanted to be moving to Idaho with him and experiencing all those things that we had planned together... Right now, my life motto is, "life is never what you expect it to be." I felt like I had it all figured out there for a while, I found someone that I thought I was in love with and was making life plans with him... I recently moved to Tucson with my Mom and Step-Dad and I can honestly say that the move was hard at first but I have learned to move on... I still have my bad days but they are few and far between. I still cry sometimes when I think back to the way things were, but I'm learning that those tears aren't worth it anymore. I have started to discover who I am again, I have learned to focus on myself and not on someone who doesn't appreciate me for me... I'm starting to be back to my old self, with some changes too!! I went to the singles ward institute on Wednesday night and we were talking about love and lust and the differences between the two. The teacher was referencing a talk from the Ensign and there was one particular part that really stood out to me, "sometimes lust is mistaken for true love." I realized that this is so true. Don't get me wrong, I loved Wes and still do but I look back on our relationship and we had absolutely nothing in common and couldn't for the life of us get along or agree on anything. I just hope that the next time I put myself out there for another man that it is true love and that he will love me for me and not try to change me because there is something that he may not like. When you love someone you love them for who they are and even those things that drive you a little bonkers you still love those quirks about them. I can't wait to find that someone out there, I know he's waiting for me just as I am waiting for him... Until then!!