Update...

So life took me down a completely different road than I ever thought I would go down... Wes and I called the wedding off 5 days before. Things have been rough the last month. I keep thinking to myself I had it all figured out and everything seemed to be going as planned, I learned some really big lessons through all of this. Life throws you curve balls sometimes and you find that you weren't necessarily prepared for them. I have to say that it hasn't been easy trying to move on and at times I catch myself hoping that maybe something drastic will happen and things will be completely different. I have never felt the type of hurt I have experienced with this situation before and I will be honest I wouldn't wish the hurt and pain even on my worst enemy. There have been times that I've felt like it would be easier to just give up on everything and curl up in a ball and hide. But, from all this I have also learned that there are so many opportunities out there for me... I can't say yet that I have been enjoying the single life, I forgot how lonely it could be at times but I know that with time all wounds heal. I am learning to be selfish again, I know that might sound crazy but I focused so much on making other people happy that I forgot to make myself happy. I put a lot of my dreams and hopes on hold and revolved my life around this person that I loved so much. I compromised my relationship with my Heavenly Father but have found that he still loves me and wants to me come back to him and to rely on him for help and guidance. This is a road I never want to return to and I have set goals in my mind that I will not return to it. The most important thing I have learned through this is that family is number 1 no matter what!! Everyone has helped me through this journey and given me words of advice. They have all loved me unconditionally and have been there to lend me their shoulders to cry on. Life is never exactly what you want it to be, and I hope from all of this that I can learn from my mistakes and better myself. Thanks to everyone that has helped me through all of this, I love you all!!